some old joke from christopher's email..i found this one very funny..it made me laugh like this (wawawawawawa) for 211 hourss..fwuhh~wawawawawa XD
1)There were three men who were on a cruise ship that hit a rock and sank. The three guys survived by swimming to a nearby island that seemed empty. Unfortunately, it was inhabited by canibals who took the three men in to the village to eat. In the village, the men pleaded for their lives, so the chief of the tribe came to them.The Chief told them to go in the jungle and collect 10 of any fruit, but all 10 have to be the same. And so the men ran into the jungle to collect their order. The first man returned with 10 apples. The Chief said to shove all 10 up their butts in order to be set free, but if ANY expresion is made, they will be killed and eaten. The first man nervously began to put in one apple, but as he put in the second one, he squinched in pain. He then got killed and eaten. The second man returned with 10 grapes, and the Chief told him the same rule. He agreed and began to put them up his pooper. 1..2...3...4..5..6..7..8..... As he was inserting the 9th grape, he suddenly burst out in laughter. He then got killed and eaten. In heaven, the first man ran up to the second man and asked, 'Hey! You almost made it out alive! Why did you laugh?!'The second man replied, 'Because I saw the third guy come back with watermelons!'
wawawawawaXD
2)While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.Bush asks how she knows if they’re intelligent.“I do so by asking them the right questions,” says the Queen. “Allow me to demonstrate.” Bush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, “Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?” Tony Blair responds, “It’s me, ma’am.” “Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir,” says the Queen. She hangs up and says, “Did you get that, Mr. Bush?” Bush nods: “Yes ma’am. Thanks a lot. I’ll definitely be using that!” Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he’d better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, “Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me.” “Why, of course, sir. What’s on your mind?” Bush poses the question: “Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?” Helms hems and haws and finally asks, “Can I think about it and get back to you?”Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem. “Now look here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?” Powell answers immediately, “It’s me, of course.” Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, “I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It’s Colin Powell!” And Bush replies in disgust, “Wrong, you dumb shit, it’s Tony Blair!”
